Well, to be honest i don’t really think about Charlton Heston that much and this really doesn’t come as much surprise the man was about 1000 years old (read – 84). Anyway, he has been around for quite a long time doing various crazy things such as being the President of the National Rifle Association and also the not as crazy Screen Actors Guild. The cause of death is not yet known, he was diagnosed with symptoms consistent with Alzheimer’s Disease in 2002.
So in honor of his death i will post his diaries.
April 14th, 2003
Dear Diary,
Today I killed a man with my own damned hands.
I was on the city bus when the murder transpired. I had just travelled to the public library to rent a copy of The Ten Commandments. The events that followed led naturally to the murder, and I do not fault myself for it. I am positive anyone would have done the same thing if put in my position.
What happened was this: I suddenly felt the urge to kill a man with my bare hands. The lust sometimes comes over me— as I am sure it does us all— and I find it best not to argue with the kill-lust, but rather feed the hunger as one would a pet of some kind.
Reaching over to the man next to me, I lightly placed my hand atop his shoulder, and with the other hand holding The Ten Commandments attempted a friendly wave.
“Hello, hippie,” I said chummily. “Petitioned your government to abolish guns lately? Me too—we’re all hippie friends here. There’s nothing to be frightened of.”
“Um hey,” said the man. “Say aren’t you Cha—”, and then I damned well killed him, pummeling him in the neck with The Ten Commandments until he was dead.
I laughed a hearty baritone laugh, with my hands atop my hips. “I’m Charlton damned Heston!” I yelled to everyone on the bus. “And I just killed a man with my own damned hands, you filthy hippies!”
Ha HA! They didn’t have much to say about that!
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